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FRIDAY FREE KICK: Sports are mean and I hate them

Nothing good comes from sports.

Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

I really wonder why I keep watching sports.

Let me rephrase that, sorry. I really wonder why I keep watching sports outside of my job.

Sports are designed to disappoint you. With the amount of professional teams in the United States, there will never be a permanent champion. The hard work you enjoy watching a team pouring their heart and soul into success will only last you until the next team finds a way to overcome their success and supplant their own.

A lot of my friends [writers note: what friends, bozo] don't watch sports with the same intensity I do. They seem happier most of the time, not letting the actions of insanely talented athletes dictate the state of their emotional health.

I am a Knicks, Rangers, Red Bulls, and Mets fan. This has been my past three years shown in video form.

First there was this:

Then this:

And then this:

And of course, who can forget this:

Then who can really forget this:


Followed by this, which always just gets me each time:

And then last week, this:

Sports are dumb. Don't watch sports.