clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

FRIDAY FREE KICK Please stop with the guacamole nonsense

Erika Goldring/Getty Images

We get it. Guacamole is the greatest thing in the world. It's great on tacos, burritos, ham sandwiches, tuna salad, spinach, yada yada yada. Let's be honest with ourselves for just a minute, okay? Salsa is by far the best Mexican restaurant dipping condiment.

Salsa blows guac out of the freaking water. Guac is the most overrated food in the entire world. Stop trying to make it a thing by putting it on every imaginable dish known to man. You doing that tricking restaurants like Subway to put their crappy version of it all over their brand new sandwiches and other places to invent special dishes just for you dedicated guacamole lovers.

This is a sham. Guacamole is the lettuce of condiments. It serves absolutely no purpose other than to ruin the good things it's forced on top of. Salsa is the Lionel Messi to Guac's Gonzalo Higuain. Sure, some people might like Higuain, but he's never going to be Messi and only ruins the great things that Messi hopes to achieve by missing sitters in the World Cup final.

Guac is terrible. Stop forcing it down our throats.

Send hate tweets to: @RobUsry