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Jeffrey Adam Larentowicz entered the world 33 years ago today in Pasadena, California with a well-timed slide tackle into a nurse’s waiting arms.
I’ve made no secret about Jeff Larentowicz being my favorite player and, I’ll admit, half the time I forget he’s even on the field. But when I remember to take stock of what Larentowicz is doing as a player, I’m reminded that he’s doing more than just about anyone else.
His defensive positioning, his ability to keep possession, his work rate, his knack for making goal saving tackles, his distribution, his leadership, his consistency and a host of other traits are invaluable to this Atlanta United squad, but often unnoticed. And I think that’s exactly the way he wants it.
I like to joke about Larentowicz a lot – mainly because his playing style is NPR on horse tranquilizers levels of exciting (sorry, Jeff) – but, I wanted to sincerely say that he’s a good guy, a good interview who gives thoughtful answers even when it’s some dumb kid from a soccer blog asking him questions, and a good soccer player.
Happy birthday, Jeff.
Anyway, I’m on Twitter all day today posting some Jeff fun facts and gifs and whatever other stupid things I can think of in appreciation of our underappreciated midfielder. Come share your own Jeff fun facts (real or not) and check out some of the #content like this:
Jeff Larentowicz played at Brown University, proving that Ivy League book smarts transfer into high IQ defensive positioning on the pitch.
— Happy Birthday Jeff (@J_SamJones) August 5, 2017
Jeff currently has played in 344 MLS games. With 6 more appearances Jeff will be the 11th outfield player to 350.
— P I Jr (@imbrianojr) August 5, 2017
Jeff Larentowicz's nickname section on Wikipedia is the greatest nickname section of all time #HappyBirthdayJeff #GingerBonita pic.twitter.com/YOctEQ3GYE
— Happy Birthday Jeff (@J_SamJones) August 5, 2017
The meaty, Ivy League educated forehead of Jeff Larentowicz finds the net for LA. #GingerBonita #HappyBirthdayJeff pic.twitter.com/qQrkKy2syl
— Happy Birthday Jeff (@J_SamJones) August 5, 2017
If you don’t have Twitter (lucky) or just try to avoid the site altogether (smart), the comment section below will be a Jeff Larentowicz appreciation thread.
I would tell you to go wish him happy birthday on social media, but he refuses to engage in such things because they would distract from watching game film.
P.S. Calling it now. Jeff will score his first Atlanta United goal tomorrow night and it will be the grittiest goal of the season. Ginger Bonita, y’all.